there was a fricking bird in the damn house

ok so kim all comes over and we are perfectly loafing in the living room when all of a sudden my sister starts screaming bloody murder abt this frickign bird that is perched on the curtain rod next to the tv. . . . . . alright alright so it wasn't a bird exactly. it was a roach that was the size of a fricking bird. so after not finding bug spray in the whole damn house my sister finds it in the bathroom so now that i feel stupid i go after the animal like thing with the spray and a fly swatter . . . . . . may i remind you that here in Hawaii roaches fricking fly. . .. . . . . . ok so the first blast of bug death in a can only pisses the thing off and it flys for it's life on to my face. . . . not really but i did beat it till dead after which Kim beat it till mutilated. . . . . so ends the evening